Rulings of Divorce – Causing corruption on earth

Family and society, heart-softening issues, morals, etiquettes, Fiqh
Divorce, seditions, family issues and society issues
'Abdul-'Aziz ibn 'Abdullah Al Sheikh  
Riyadh
17/6/1424
Imam Turkey ibn 'Abdullah's mosque
  
Summary of the Sermon

1. Necessity of fulfilling the conjugal rights
2. Islam keenness to the regularity of marriage
3. Divorce is the last solution
4. Islam regulates divorce
5. Satan's joy at the separation between the spouses
6. Warning against anger
7. The wisdom behind legalizing divorce
8. The duty of the families of the spouses
9. Warning against offence and harm after divorce
10. Warning against those who corrupt under the name of religion 

The first Sermon: 

To proceed…

O people! Fear Allah (the Exalted) as He should be feared. 

O servants of Allah, Allah (Exalted be He) explained the due mutual rights of the spouses saying: "And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses, etc.) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect, etc.) to what is reasonable." (Surat Al-Baqarah, 2:228).

Allah explained that a husband has obligatory due rights toward his wife and a wife has obligatory due rights toward her husband. 

When the spouses recall these duties and fulfill their duties toward each other, marriage will be stable, the house affairs will be regulated, the family will live in prosperity, tranquility and peace and each one of them will devote himself/herself to fulfill his/her duty. 

A man should know that he is responsible for his wife and Allah will ask him about her; she is a trust and Allah will ask him about this trust. A wife resides in her husband's house and therefore he is asked to provide for her and pay for her clothing and all other necessities. He is required to live with her on equitable terms, treating her nicely with kindness and good manners. 

A woman should also perceive this reality and know that once the marriage contract is concluded, she will become a follower of her husband. It is her duty to fulfill her duty towards him; hearing and obedience to him when he orders with good, not to disobey him and to fulfill her marital duties. 

When each one of them knows his/her duty and fulfill it, the conjugal life will be good and calm, full of love, intimacy and harmony and the children will be brought up in such blessed cooperative life. However, marital life is weakened when each of the spouses doesn't fulfill his duty; when man is neglecting his wife's rights such as clothing, housing, maintenance; when he maltreats her, addresses her with the worst speech; when he doesn't put up with her mistakes; when he blames her for every slip, and punishes her at every lapse because he doesn't appreciate any kind or good act she did.

Now when it is the wife who is to blame; when she misbehaves and becomes stubborn, there is an occasion of her family or the family of the husband to get involved, igniting troubles that may undermine the safety and tranquility of the house. 

Dear Muslims, Islam is keen on the regularity and continuity of marital life; it guides the husband when he feels neglected by his wife with this ayah: "As to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful); but if they obey you, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allâh is Ever Most High, Most Great." (Surah Al-Nisa', 4:34). 

Islam recommends man to advise his wife because reminders benefit the believers. In the instance when she disobeys him, he should advise and remind her of Allah and His punishment. If she is good and faithful, her faith will stop her to continue doing wrong. Next step of discipline is to stop talking to her, and then to put the bed relation on hold; this particular procedure might work.

A husband is given concession to beat his wife lightly for discipline, but if things get worse, two judges from both sides may judge between the spouses to straighten out their relation, consider the causes of disagreement and check if avoiding these causes is possible. All these efforts are exerted in order to safeguard marriage and ensure regularity of the marital life. 

Dear Muslims! Divorce in Islam is not the first solution; it is to be sought when no other solution proves workable and when reconciliatory efforts come to an impasse, in which case a husband may pursue divorce as the last resort. 

In general, divorce destroys marriage and splits the family; the wife loses a husband and the children risk getting lost between a harsh father and a mother lacking resources. That will be the greatest scourge. 

Dear Muslims! When divorce was ordained by Allah, it was ordained to meet a pressing need. He didn't ordain it for the sake of it, but because it renders a benefit. Divorce is the least preferable lawful thing to Allah as the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "The permissible thing which is most disliked by Allah is divorce." [1] The Prophet (peace be upon him) warned the Muslim woman who ask her divorce without a good reason as saying: "Any woman who asks her husband divorce without a good reason, will be deprived from the smell of Paradise (and therefore will not enter it)." [2] 

Dear Muslims, divorce is not ordained for nothing and is not left to the desire of man or woman; it was ordained according to a precise, effective, useful system. It works as a cure and a cure can only be used proportional to the urgency of the case. If a doctor prescribes a medicine, should it be taken all at once and that's it? No, it has to be taken at specific stated times. Therefore divorce is a cure that has to be used only when needed. 

In the pre-Islamic period, people used to practice unsystematic divorce. Man would divorce his wife anytime he wishes and when it was time for her to finish her waiting period, he would take her back in marriage. A husband could then give his wife a hundred divorces. However, when Islam came, it put an end to that mess by limiting the number of divorces and determining the appropriate time to do it. That way the spouses are given a chance to reconsider it; perhaps things may go back to normal. 

First: The Lawgiver specified a time for divorce and didn't allow a Muslim to divorce whenever he wishes in order to prevent reckless acts and check the conduct of those who do not consider the effects of their actions. 

According to Shari‘ah, a woman is to be divorced when she gets clean from her period and after there has been no sexual relation throughout that period. If a man divorces his wife while having sexual intercourse in that period, he will be considered disobedient to Allah because she might be pregnant and by divorce the waiting period will get longer. In some cases, a husband may not have a wish to live with his wife any longer, but this kind of divorce will have him to wait until the pregnancy term is over, which may cause him and her harm equally. Therefore, it is prohibited to divorce one's wife in the non-period time while having had intercourse with her. Likewise, a husband is prohibited to divorce his wife during her period because the period prevents from sexual relations, which may cause a dislike for her (in that period), and also because this will make her waiting period longer. 

A husband is prohibited to give his wife a triple divorce in one pronouncement, as in saying: 'You are divorced thrice'. When the Prophet (peace be upon him) heard a man saying to his wife: you are divorced thrice, he became angry and said: "Do you play with the Book of Allah while I'm (still alive) among you?!"[3] This shows that he committed a major sin. 

The Prophet (peace be upon him) warned Muslims against playing with the words of divorce. He said that divorce will be effective no matter whether it said seriously or not. The Prophet says: "Three matters are effective whether done jokingly or seriously: marriage, divorce and revocation of the divorced wife." [4]. It is not permissible for joke with divorce; it is a legal ruling and Allah says: "And do not take the verses of Allah in jest." [Surah Al-Baqarah, 2:231] 

If a husband wishes to divorce his wife one time to leave her until her waiting period elapses, he should not utter two pronouncements of divorce during her non-period time because that won't avail him. If he divorces her and has no intention to continue conjugal life with her, by the elapse of her waiting period she becomes ajnabiyyah (not related to him). Under the current condition they cannot reunite again unless after the conclusion of a brand new marriage contract with her consent. This is typically the case when a woman is divorced one time and her waiting period was terminated. All these strict measures were introduced in order not to open the door for Muslims to play with the words of divorce and not to get into trouble. In the case of a triple divorce, a wife cannot return to her ex-husband until she marries another husband by her desire and not in order to be able to go back to her first husband. All these procedures are meant to keep the bond of marriage so it won't be tampered with by the small-minded ones. 

Dear Muslims, the devil, which is the enemy of Allah, is pleased with you when you are angry or act foolishly; he reminds you of divorce all the time and whispers it in your ears. But if you fear Allah and have insight, you will not listen to the insinuation of the enemy of Allah. It is narrated in the Hadith: "Satan places his throne upon water; then sends detachments (for creating dissension); one of them comes and says: I did not spare so and so until I sowed the seed of discord between him and his father or between him and his mother or his brothers. Then he (Satan) says: you did nothing. They will be made up with one another. Another one comes and says: I did not spare so and so until I sowed the seed of discord between him and his wife. The Satan goes near him and says: 'You have done well. And He then embraces him and says: You are so and so." [5] Satan is pleased with the separation between the spouses. He is pleased with the breaking up of the family and its destruction. 

Dear Muslims! Be keen on the regularity of the marital life! 

O man! You are the most powerful and the firmest. Be aware not to divorce without a good reason. Be aware of boredom, impatience and running out of forbearance. Consider your words before you open your mouth and think of the consequences. If you are overpowered by anger, sit if you are standing, lie down if you are sitting, perform Wudu' (ablution), seek refuge with Allah from the accursed Satan or go out of the house; so that anger may be gone. 

O wise Muslim man! It is not appropriate to utter divorce frequently. Do not make it the easy way to solve problems; there are always a variety of means that you can use to solve your problems. If you have had a long day or if you are mad for any reason, is no excuse to be mad at your wife when she shows some neglect in a duty. Don't hesitate to pardon slips and overlook things that may be overlooked. As long as religion is sound, honor is clear and dignity is preserved, other matters can be pardoned and fixed. As for the rush in divorce for trivial reasons, it is not appropriate for a sensible man who is sober-minded and can take the right decision. 

Dear Muslims! You must have patience, forbearance! Think how it would be after divorce. If a man doesn't care due to weakness in his faith, lack in patience, running out of forbearance, he destroys his marriage in a minute. 
Dear Muslims! Divorce was legislated to help a man get rid of an inappropriate woman and a women of an inappropriate man. But it is the duty of the spouses to exert efforts in order to bring themselves together on terms and avoid mistakes if they could bear and endure. 

The family of the husband and that of the wife have to exert efforts to prevent problems from appearing. The family of the wife should advise her and commend her to have patience and not to keep complaining unnecessarily. The family of the husband should advise him and commend him to have patience and firmness. If they both co-operate to do good, marital life would be in the best state.  
Dear Muslims! Some men practice pressure on women even after divorce in order to take revenge. A man may take children as a pressure card and not allow his ex-wife to see them. He may leave them not cared nor provided for, which causes them to be lost. He may take them and treat them roughly without lenience or kindness. He may even leave them to the care of their mother, disregarding his financial responsibility towards them. The mother may also be angry with her ex-husband and take revenge by not allowing him to see his kids. All these mistakes must be avoided and corrected. We should not take marriage an object of revenge and harming others. 

Let's fear Allah. Our Lord (Exalted be He) commanded the husband to leave the divorced wife in his house during her waiting period, perhaps Allah causes something to happen which may bring about reconciliation.

Allah made divorce in three stages: first, second and then third. 

The first divorce is revocable in case the spouses regret it, and then there is a second divorce. If the third divorce is given, this indicates that the marital life can no longer persist nor stay stable.

All people must respect the limits of Allah and not transgress them because Allah says: "And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah, then he has wronged himself." [Surah At-Talaq, 65:1]. 

Let's fear Allah concerning the divorce we make as regards time, number, and reasons, and not to resort to it except after all other means have proved not workable. 

I supplicate Allah for success and guidance to you and me and support in all that is good. 

This is my word to you and I seek Allah's forgiveness to you, me and all Muslims from every fault. Seek His forgiveness for He is the Oft-Forgiving and the Merciful. 

I seek refuge with Allah against the accursed Satan: "O Prophet, when you [Muslims] divorce women, divorce them for [the commencement of] their waiting period and keep count of the waiting period, and fear Allah, your lord. Do not turn them out of their [husbands'] houses, nor should they [themselves] leave [during that period] unless they are committing a clear immorality. And those are the limits [set by] Allah. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah has certainly wronged himself. You know not; perhaps Allah will bring about after that a [different] matter." [Surah At-Talaq, 65:1] 
 
[1] Related by Abu Dawud in the Book of Divorce, Chapter: Disapproval of Divorce (2178), and Ibn Majah in Divorce, Chapter: Suwaid ibn Sa'eed related (2018) from the Hadith of Ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with him).  Al-Albani regarded it as weak Hadith in his book Erwa' (2040).   

[2] Related by Ahmad (5/277-283) and Abu Dawud in the Book of Divorce, Chapter: Khul' (woman seeks divorce from the judge for return of the dowry) and At-Tirmidhi in the Book of Divorce. Chapter: Narrations concerning women who seek their divorce (1187), and Ibn Majah in the Book of Divorce, Chapter: Disapproval of Khul' to Women (2055) from the Hadith of Thawban (may Allah be pleased with him) At-Tirmidhi said: "It is a good Hadith" and authenticated by Ibn Al-Jaroud (748), Ibn Khuzaimah in Al-Fath Book (9/403), Ibn Hibban (4184), Al-Hakim (2809) and authenticated by Al-Albani in Erwa' Al-Ghalil (2035).  

[3] An-Nasa'i related it in the Book of Divorce, Chapter: The Thrice Divorce and Its Ruling (3401) from the Hadith of Mahmoud ibn Labeed (may Allah be pleased with him).  Al-Hafez said in his book Fath Al-Bary (9/362): its narrators are trustworthy. But Mahmoud ibn Labeed was born in the lifetime of the Prophet (peace be upon him) but he didn't hear from him; yet he was considered from the companions because he saw the Prophet (peace be upon him). Ahmad mentioned his story in Al-Musnad and related several Hadiths from him and nothing of them contained "I heard from the Messenger". An-Nasa'i said after mentioning the authentication standard of the Hadith: I don't know any one related the hadith other than Makhramah ibn Bakeer - i.e. ibn Al-Ashajj from his father. The narration of Makhrammah from his father is related in Sahih Muslim in several Hadiths. It is said: He didn't hear from his father. Al-Albani authenticated the Hadith in his Book Ghayat Al-Maram (261).  

[4] Related by Abu Dawud in the Book of Divorce, Chapter: Jesting in Divorce (2194) and At-Tirmidhi in the Book of Divorce. Chapter: Seriousness and Joking in Divorce (1184) and Ibn Majah in the Book of Divorce, Chapter: He who divorced or commenced marriage... (2039) from the Hadith of Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him): At-Tirmidhi said: "It is a hasan (good), gharib (strange) Hadith" It is approved by Al-Albani in Erwa' (1826).  

[5] Related by Muslim in the description of Judgment Day, Paradise and Hell-Fire. Chapter: Satan's provocation and sending his followers to seduce people (2813) from the Hadith of Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him). 
 

 
The Second Sermon 

Praise be to Allah abundantly to the liking of our Lord and that which achieves His Pleasure. I bear witness that there is no god but Allah alone and there is no partner with Him. I testify that Muhammad is His servant and Messenger (peace be upon him), his family and companions until the Judgment Day. 

Then: Dear Muslims, Allah (Exalted be He) says: "And O Adam! Dwell you and your wife in Paradise, and eat thereof as you both wish, but approach not this tree otherwise you both will be of the Zâlimûn (unjust and wrong-doers).” Then Shaitân (Satan) whispered suggestions to them both in order to uncover that which was hidden from them of their private parts (before); he said: “Your Lord did not forbid you this tree save you should become angels or become of the immortals.” And he [Shaitân (Satan)] swore by Allâh to them both (saying): “Verily, I am one of the sincere well-wishers for you both. So he misled them with deception.” [Surah Al-A'raf, 7:19-22]. 

Dear brothers: Our Lord (Exalted be He) explained to us that He made our forefather Adam and his wife to dwell in Paradise and made everything in Paradise lawful for them except for one tree which was forbidden to eat or even to draw near: "But approach not this tree otherwise you both will be of the Zâlimûn (unjust and wrong-doers).” Only one tree that Adam and his wife were prohibited to eat from. Other than that everything was lawful to them. What did Satan do? He whispered to them and said: Your Lord did not forbid you this tree save you should become angels or become of the immortals so if you ate from it, you will be with the immortals. Then he swore to them that he is a sincere adviser, but in fact he misled them with deception. 

Dear brothers: Thus does Satan with human beings; he shows evil, corruption and affliction in the form of reform and good will. He adorns falsehood in order to look like good. He beautifies evil to them until they think it is right. This is the case of all the Satan's helpers from among human devils who strive upon earth to cause corruption. They deceive, seduce and prevent the ignorant from the path of Allah. They show falsehood to them in the form of truth and evil in the form of good. The ignorant thinks that they are right but Allah knows that they are corrupters. 

Dear Muslims! How many an enemy who is waiting for the chance to strive in the land to cause corruption by spreading doubts that serve his purposes and desires. His heart may be weak, full of hypocrisy and envy against Islam and its people. He does not get pleased and satisfied unless he sees evil spreading among Muslims. He – I seek refuge with Allah from him - is a caller for delusion who strives in the land to cause corruption. He comes to an ignorant person or an inexperienced teenager who have no mature understanding and beautifies falsehood to them. He beautifies the killing of innocent people, bloodshed and disorder. He may trick them into doing horrible things like killing and destroying under the impression of enjoining good and forbidding evil. He may fool them by such claims as fighting Allah's enemies and supporting His followers. He may come in different forms but Allah knows that his goal is to corrupt. He may allure them into doing criminal acts by promising them Paradise as a reward for killing the disbelievers and the infidels. So, the people of Islam who establish prayer and observe fasting are seen by such a wicked evil person as criminals who should be killed and eradicated.  

Thus, the enemies of Islam beautify evil to people who do not have clear vision or knowledge in the same manner that Satan beautified it to our forefather Adam when he ate from the forbidden tree until he was descended to earth. However, Allah corrected Adam, forgave him and accepted his repentance. 

Dear Muslim youth! Beware of evil people. Beware of evil people! Keep away from evil gatherings and evil mongers no matter how much fake fear they show for religion and concern for defending it. If such people order you to kill people, shed their blood or terrify them or breach the security, that's a clear indication that they are criminals and corrupters. The reformer doesn't call for sedition nor support it. He rather calls for good and enjoins good through legal ways. As for bloodshed and killing of the innocent, they destroy the whole Ummah and can in no way be regarded as part of religion; this is the product of Satan. Don't obey those people! Don't follow them and don't obey them in whatever they say or show. They are your real enemies even if they appear otherwise. If their hearts were full of faith and peace, they would have sanctified blood, properties and honors. Your blood, properties and honors are as sacred and inviolable. The Hadith says: "A believer continues to guard his Faith (and thus hopes for Allah's Mercy) so long as he does not shed blood unjustly." [1] 

Dear Muslim brother! How could a man sanction the killing of a security man, for instance who defends his religion and his Ummah. Why there is blood-shed? Why? Because the killers think their victims are disbelievers; so for them shedding blood is lawful and killing is an obligation. All these errors are the product of the callers to seditions, the people of delusion, those whose hearts are full of sickness and envy against Islam and its people. 

Dear Muslim youth! Be conscious of Allah! Enjoining good, forbidding evil and calling to Allah and His religion are needed but with the legal permitted ways; by enjoining good within its boundaries and calling to Allah through the right ways. Considering bloodshed and terrifying the secured people as the means to achieve reform is absolutely wrong. This is not reformation; in fact it is against reformation. 

Let's fear Allah in ourselves. Let's fear Allah in our security and the security of the society. Let's keep advising and cooperating among ourselves in order to find a way to reduce this crime and even eradicate it. Each one of us is responsible for his duty toward his Ummah. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "May Allah curse one who gives protection to a Muhdith." [2] Muhdith is an outlaw oppressor who is not permitted to be given protection or shelter. If he were to be left alone to go to extremes in his crimes and corruption, his harm will not be restricted to a specific group; it will extend to you, your family and your society. 

Let's fear Allah in ourselves and not obey our enemies and those who harbor envy against Islam and its people. We are all responsible for our security, which we supplicate Allah to save against every evil. We seek Allah's refuge against the evils of ourselves and against our sins for fear they may be against us. We ask Allah safety and firmness. No doubt that which hit us is by our own sins and Allah doesn't wrong His servants. 

Know – may Allah bestow mercy on you – that the best speech is the words of Allah, and the best guidance is the guidance of Muhammad. The worst matter is innovation (in religion) and every innovation is a heresy. Keep to the Muslim's community because Allah supports the group and he who insists on hardships in matters of religion will be in the fire. 

Send your peace and blessings upon your Prophet Muhammad as your Lord commanded you. Allah says: "Allâh sends His Salât (Graces, Honours, Blessings, Mercy) on the Prophet (Muhammad peace be upon him), and also His angels (ask Allâh to bless and forgive him). O you who believe! Send your Salât on (ask Allâh to bless) him (Muhammad peace be upon him), and (you should) greet (salute) him with the Islâmic way of greeting (salutation i.e. As-Salâmu ‘Alaikum)." [Surah Al-Ahzab, 33:56] 

O Allah! Send Your peace and blessings on Your servant and Messenger Muhammad and be pleased with his guided successors! 
  
[1] Related by Al-Bukhari in the Book of Diyyat (blood money and financial compensations for physical damages), Chapter: Allah's saying: He who kills a believer deliberately... (6862) from the Hadith of Ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with him).  

[2] Related by Muslim in the Book of Sacrifices, Chapter: The Prohibition to Sacrifice to Other than Allah... (1978) from the Hadith of 'Ali ibn Abu Taleb (may Allah be pleased with him)